by ken winston caine

You have three choices with fear: (more…)

When I read Tracy A.’s newest piece, Top 10 Things Between You and a Great Life, it felt eerie.

I thought, “This girl’s been reading my mail!”

Because, at one time or another, I’ve fallen into every one of these traps. And I bet you have, too.

Having them listed and explained eloquently, as Tracy does here (reprinted with permission), is a powerful resource for motivational behavior change… I expect to review the list often. Just to remind myself of the tempting and almost automatic habits, cop-outs and defensive behaviors to work around.
– ken winston caine

Top 10 Things Between You and a Great Life

by Tracy A.

If you’re not living the life you dream about (and if you’re like most people you’re not) then identifying what’s getting in your way could be the most valuable way you’ve ever spent your time. Here are the Top 10 Things that come Between You and a Great Life!

1. Playing it safe.

One of the hardest things for most people to do is to risk the level of success they’ve achieved in order to reach the next level, but playing it safe isn’t the way most people dream of living.

2. Being comfortable.

We all have a desire to coast at times but settling into your comfort zone is a death knell for an extraordinary life. Where in your life are you choosing comfortable over greatness?

3. Avoiding rejection.

If you’re like me you’re OK with taking risks as long as they’re not too risky! I’m not a big believer in jumping off cliffs and building wings on the way down; I just don’t believe that life has to be that frantic but I do know that my fear of rejection is one of the fears that I still struggle with and it’s been eye opening to take a look at how it really gets in my way.

4. Procrastinating.

We tell ourselves some fantastic stories to increase our level of comfort with not getting off our duff and going on there and really scuffling it up on the (more…)

Before you speak, ask yourself:
+ Is it kind?
+ Is it necessary?
+ Is it true?
+ Does it (more…)

by ken winston caine

“Wag more. Bark less.”

Bumpersticker wisdom I saw for the second time yesterday.

And, in general, damn good advice, says he who probably growls, whines and bares his teeth far, far too much.

Over the decades of mind-body research, multiple studies have observed the many physical, emotional and social benefits of behaviors that can be summarized essentially as “wag more; bark less.”

Well-done scientific studies have looked at things like full-hearted laughter, loving attitudes, smiling. And the science is this: Laugh more, love more, smile more and the world laughs, loves and smiles more with you.

Who wouldn’t want that?

So, wag more. Bark less.

Because when you get down to the nitty gritty, wagging is nothing more than a delighfully engaging way of expressing a full-body smile.

by ken winston caine

Here’s a magical question that changes EVERYTHING! Practice asking it of yourself throughout your day.

Especially ask it when feeling overwhelm, upset, frustration, and so forth. The question:

How would you like to feel right now?

Put it in the first person form, of course. That is:

How would I like to feel right now?

And be perfectly honest — and really, really sure of your answer.

And then: (more…)

by ken winston caine

Dr. Dolittle was very busy.

He was busy trying to decide things.

He was trying to decide: Should he do this? Or should he do that?

And if he did this, should he do it tomorrow or the day after?

And then, should he do it in yellow, or should he do it in blue? And would that be sky blue — as if the sky is still blue anywhere.

Dr. Dolittle decided to consult the internet.

Is there anywhere where the sky is still truly blue? And exactly what shade of blue is sky blue anyway? Does it have, for instance, a PMS number — one of the numbers that printers and designers consult on a chart as they mix pigments in order to assure consistency in colors from job to job and across the industry?

Or, Dr. Dolittle wondered, with computer graphics the standard now, do printers still use PMS numbers?

He decided to consult the internet.

Dr. Dolittle is very, very busy.

Dr. Dolittle fired up his computer.

He planned to Google whether printers still use PMS numbers. Whether he should do this or that.

Whether tomorrow or the day after.

Whether in blue, or yellow, if the day after.

But first, he thought as the computer came to life, I should check my email.

And that caused him to recall six or seven emails that earlier in the morning he had been thinking that he needed to send.

A couple were especially urgent. And a couple were to respond to people who had emailed but to whom he had not responded for several days. One he hadn’t replied to for more than a week. Better do it now, before he forgets, he thought.

Otherwise those people will think that he is impolite. Or doesn’t like them any more. Or is incompetent.

Or dead.

One absolutely must respond to emails.

He began re-composing in his mind a couple of the of the emails that earlier in the morning he had been thinking that he should send.

But it had been too early then. The computer was not on. And he had not had his tea. Or his breakfast.

He had not brushed his teeth.

One should never send an email before one has brushed their teeth.

Nor had he caught the top of the hour news on Morning Edition. And now, (more…)

Michael Lutin says the “miracle is a mind game. Learn to play it.”

You might as well. You’ve got nothing better to do.

The Jesus in “A Course in Miracles” said pretty much the same thing.
– kwc

These are words from the ancient Upanishads — Hindu Scripture.

They describe how to attain and sustain a state of being at one with God. Or, put another way, how to achieve a Godly state, in spite of your Self.

Two minutes and 19 seconds of calming, clearing expression.

They remind me of what I used to describe as “the beautiful riddles” that came from Jiddu Krishnamurti’s mouth during his Oak Grove talks in Ojai.
–kwc

How about a short, inspiring daily quote in your email weekday mornings?