Sad Case of Dr. Dolittle and the End of Life on the Earth as We Know It
Saturday, March 21st, 2009by ken winston caine
Dr. Dolittle was very busy.
He was busy trying to decide things.
He was trying to decide: Should he do this? Or should he do that?
And if he did this, should he do it tomorrow or the day after?
And then, should he do it in yellow, or should he do it in blue? And would that be sky blue — as if the sky is still blue anywhere.
Dr. Dolittle decided to consult the internet.
Is there anywhere where the sky is still truly blue? And exactly what shade of blue is sky blue anyway? Does it have, for instance, a PMS number — one of the numbers that printers and designers consult on a chart as they mix pigments in order to assure consistency in colors from job to job and across the industry?
Or, Dr. Dolittle wondered, with computer graphics the standard now, do printers still use PMS numbers?
He decided to consult the internet.
Dr. Dolittle is very, very busy.
Dr. Dolittle fired up his computer.
He planned to Google whether printers still use PMS numbers. Whether he should do this or that.
Whether tomorrow or the day after.
Whether in blue, or yellow, if the day after.
But first, he thought as the computer came to life, I should check my email.
And that caused him to recall six or seven emails that earlier in the morning he had been thinking that he needed to send.
A couple were especially urgent. And a couple were to respond to people who had emailed but to whom he had not responded for several days. One he hadn’t replied to for more than a week. Better do it now, before he forgets, he thought.
Otherwise those people will think that he is impolite. Or doesn’t like them any more. Or is incompetent.
Or dead.
One absolutely must respond to emails.
He began re-composing in his mind a couple of the of the emails that earlier in the morning he had been thinking that he should send.
But it had been too early then. The computer was not on. And he had not had his tea. Or his breakfast.
He had not brushed his teeth.
One should never send an email before one has brushed their teeth.
Nor had he caught the top of the hour news on Morning Edition. And now, (more…)